Mental Sanitation
Oct. 16th, 2013 06:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
catsittingstillOn top of trying to record and mix I've spend days---days!---fighting phantoms generated by someone who is theoretically a friend. Literally having to stop mixing to pace the house and shout. I don't have time to get this upset.
I really should have realized sooner that someone who despises atheists is not healthy company for me to keep, no matter how entertaining they may be in other ways. I want to defend myself--to set people straight--but it's like scratching poison oak; I feel better for a little while and then much worse. It is time to stop.
I am now so raw on the subject that when my husband joked about telling his students not to call the house at odd hours because "my wife might not treat you in a christian manner" I started to cry. I need for this not to be rubbed in my face anymore.
I am sometimes a slow learner. Sometimes I love my own pride better than my peace of mind. But it is time to get myself some peace of mind to work in. I have fixed the problem I think, and hopefully the toxins will work their way out of my system over the next week or two because I really have too much to do to be distracted like this.
I really should have realized sooner that someone who despises atheists is not healthy company for me to keep, no matter how entertaining they may be in other ways. I want to defend myself--to set people straight--but it's like scratching poison oak; I feel better for a little while and then much worse. It is time to stop.
I am now so raw on the subject that when my husband joked about telling his students not to call the house at odd hours because "my wife might not treat you in a christian manner" I started to cry. I need for this not to be rubbed in my face anymore.
I am sometimes a slow learner. Sometimes I love my own pride better than my peace of mind. But it is time to get myself some peace of mind to work in. I have fixed the problem I think, and hopefully the toxins will work their way out of my system over the next week or two because I really have too much to do to be distracted like this.
Well...
Date: 2013-10-17 08:26 am (UTC)Re: Well...
Date: 2013-10-17 11:42 am (UTC)But if you have a twisted ankle you quit wearing high heels until it's better. And if the problem is the high heels in the first place, quitting wearing them will also help. Win-win.
And I will say it mostly seems to be one particular person who is the problem so I am taking steps to reduce my contact with that person. So I'm not sure "surrounded" would be the right preposition :-)
Re: Well...
Date: 2013-10-17 05:39 pm (UTC)Re: Well...
Date: 2013-10-17 06:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-10-17 06:50 pm (UTC)Re: Well...
Date: 2013-10-17 06:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-10-18 11:33 am (UTC)It is mostly just one person who is making me more sensitive to all the other bumps and jostles that go along with not being one of the popular and powerful religious majority.
no subject
Date: 2013-10-19 08:22 pm (UTC)And, if they're welcome, [HUGS].
no subject
Date: 2013-10-19 10:22 pm (UTC)