I killed a cat today.

[catsittingstill]

Or at least finished one off, anyway.

I was walking up the hill toward the hospital, using my desire to get my soft feet used to walking again as an excuse for being too lazy to get on my bike.  On the way home I found a black-and-white cat, off by the side of the road, lying there with its paws twitching.  I think it had been hit by a car.  It didn't seem to realize I was there, though now and again it would twitch its front paws or pedal with its hind paws--I don't know if this was its equivalent of thrashing in pain or panic or if it was just damaged nerves in the spinal cord firing off at random.

I didn't want to leave it there to suffer, but wasn't sure I could kill it myself without causing it more suffering (or convincing a random driver passing by that I am a heartless murderer of cats.)

Finally I decided I needed to go home and get my work gloves.  Whatever I was going to do, it wasn't going to involve handling an injured probably feral cat whose rabies status was unknown with my bare hands. 

On the way home I remembered that there are a couple of vets nearby.  I took stock of my finances and decided how much I could afford to spend on this cat that I can't keep in any event without my landlords permission (and frankly I didn't think its prospects were good anyway).  At home I found my gloves and a cookie sheet.  I drove to the first vet, but they only handle large animals (there are a lot of cows and horses around here).  I drove to the second vet, who handled small animals and they agreed to look at the cat.

Since there was no place to park near where I'd found the cat (ditch on one side of the road, really deep ditch and rail on the other), I walked from the second vet to the cat (it was only maybe half a mile at most anyway).  As carefully as possible I transferred the cat to the cookie sheet.  I didn't need the gloves--I don't think it even realized what was going on.

I carried it back up to the vet.  You don't realize how much your walk bounces until you're trying to carry something smoothly.

The vet looked at it, and said there was nothing to be done, so I had him put it to sleep.  It cost 40$, but that came in under my max price so, okay.

I was only a little sad at the time.  But now I feel sadder.

I didn't even know that cat.

Comments

[billroper]

You are a good person.

[quadrivium.livejournal.com]

*teary eyed Hugs*

What Bill said.

[johno.livejournal.com]

{hugs}

[aunty_marion]

*hugs* You did the best possible thing for that cat - if there was nothing to be done, as the vet says, if you'd left him there he'd have died a long lingering and possibly painful death. As it was, you gave him more dignity, and there was someone with him who empathised.

*hugs again and awards you Good Karma Points*

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Um. Thanks. But maybe just an inventive person. I suppose most people would have wanted to do something; I just happened to think of what to do in time to do it.

[admnaismith.livejournal.com]

You did the right thing, Cat. ***hugs***

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Thanks

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

I was mostly worried about not letting it suffer.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[technoshaman.livejournal.com]

Poor Kitty! And poor you, too; that's a tough one... you did right, but it's still hard. *hugs*

[smoooom.livejournal.com]

You did a good thing, this may sound weird but, the cat was lucky you found it.

[pocketnaomi.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry to hear it, but glad that the cat found a caring friend to do what was necessary to keep it from suffering more.

[karinny.livejournal.com]

Thank you for your compassion. The world needs more people like you.

[randwolf.livejournal.com]

Sympathies.

[mbumby.livejournal.com]

Sorry to hear about that -- but good on you for doing the right thing although it was difficult and cost you -- money and more.

[mdlbear]

((hugs))

It was a good thing to do.

[rms-butterfly.livejournal.com]

You were kind to that poor kitty, and some how, he knew it. I think it was a generous act of kindness.

[it-aint-easy.livejournal.com]

Bravo you.

[bardling.livejournal.com]

Yes, and that proves you're a good person. Not only did you have the compassion, but you also *acted* on it.
*hugs*

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Thanks (sad smile)

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Sigh. I like cats. I wish the cat hadn't been hurt. But given the situation, it was the only thing to do. I'm feeling better this morning.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

It does sound weird :-) but I hope you're right. Thanks.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Um. Well, it wasn't any really big thing. It was just that I found out about it, and had the time to be able to do something about it.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I feel better having done something about it than I would have if I hadn't had the time/money to help.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Well, I'd like to think he knew it, but I suspect he was 1) a feral cat and afraid of people but 2) too out of it to know what was happening anyway by the time I found him. Hopefully carrying him to the vet didn't cause him more pain.

But I'm glad I did it. Sorry it was necessary in the first place, but glad I did it.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[thatcrazycajun.livejournal.com]

You are a very compassionate, generous and brave person, in addition to being a highly talented one, and I am proud to be able to call you friend. Bless your heart for ending that poor cat's misery as quickly and gently as possible.

[infobits.livejournal.com]

I, too, have taken stray, and sometimes ill, cats to the vet and been told the kindest treatment was euthanasia. It was stressful, even for knowing the cat so short a time; I wanted so much for the problem to be fixable.

And I will note - one time, the cat actually belonged to someone and I was taken to court for 'rescuing' an owned animal. I though it had been dumped, due to the matted fur. My standard of care for an animal is higher than that and I would not have let her stay matted.

BJ

[andpuff.livejournal.com]

Many people may have felt they should do something but you actually did it. That makes you a pretty amazing person!

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

I took a dog to the humane society once because I thought it had gotten lost. Turned out it had a home nearby. Oops!

I was pretty sure that this cat wasn't going to make it, so I didn't have much hope to be cast down from. And it had no collar, so as far as I could tell it had no owner--though I could be wrong about that.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Thanks.